It feels like a million years since I've posted.
I've had this conversation enough times that I felt like needed to write a post on it...
A lot of people ask me "How do I know if I'm doing the right thing with my life?!" My first reaction is often: "...I'm only 20. How am I supposed to know?" That being said, when I give it more thought I feel like I can give an adequate, semi-helpful answer.
I'mma share with you what has helped me make it through life. Remember what the Lord told Joshua? Moses died and he was probably thinking "I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING." The Lord told him (among other things): "Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest."
     Whithersoever. That means anywhere. If you're trying to do what he wants, then he's just going to let you live your life and be there for you. He'll give directions here and there to help you out, but he lets YOU choose.
     Now then, let's talk about Nephi. 1 Nephi chapter 17 is where I want to take this. When I was at school, the director, Steven Wheelwright (to all my Seasiders: "Brothers and sisters, alooooooha!") had a discussion with some students about this chapter. From this discussion developed a phrase I live by, and that is "Just build the boat".
     Here's what I learned:

1. Even if you're doing the right thing, life WILL be hard. Nephi was doing everything he was supposed to, and he says this about his journey: "we had suffered many afflictions and much difficulty, yea, even so much that we cannot write them all." They starved. Nephi got beat up a bunch of times. They had to travel. A lot. His brothers were jerks. THEIR WIVES GAVE BIRTH IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE WITH NO PAIN MEDICATION.They were doing what the Lord asked, so it should have been a walk in the park, right? Here's a quote from a General Conference talk that is to the contrary: “Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.” Hard things allow us to learn and grow, even if it seems like you shouldn't have to deal with them. Don't you hurt after a good stretch or work out? Same thing.

2. "The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem". You know the source. Anyway, so, in the midst of all these difficulties we get the two different reactions. A. Nephi: "If God had commanded me to do all things I could do them...And now, if the Lord has such great power, and has wrought so many miracles among the children of men, how is it that he cannot instruct me, that I should build a ship?" B. The Dream Team (...Laman'n'Lemuel): "And thou art like unto our father, led away by the foolish imaginations of his heart; yea, he hath led us out of the land of 
Jerusalem, and we have wandered in the wilderness for these many years; and our women have toiled, being big with child; 
and they have borne children in the wilderness and suffered all things, save it were death; 
and it would have been better that they had died before they came out of Jerusalem than to have suffered these afflictions. 
Behold, these many years we have suffered in the wilderness, which time we might have enjoyed our possessions and the land of our inheritance; yea, and we might have been happy." 
Seriously. Don't worry about what might have been. DEAL WITH THE PRESENT ISSUE. Get'r'done. I'm notorious for whining, so I can promise you it gets nothing done. Make every choice the best choice by knowing you did all you could to do the right thing and that it will turn out ok if you keep trying.

3. Just build the boat. Nephi got step-by-step instructions "from time to time". That's how your life works too. Nephi had to pray and ask to know what to do and what the next step was. His boat was unique and unlike any he'd ever seen. Somehow, he had to make it to the promised land. Life is a one step at a time deal. Plus, as Micheal Ballam once said to me, if we knew everything that was going to happen in our future now, we wouldn't be ready to deal with it. We develop strength through those hard times that will get us through the next difficulty. Just enjoy life where you're at right now.

4. The Lord says to Nephi: "And I will also be your light in the wilderness; and I will prepare the way before you, if it so be that ye shall keep my commandments; wherefore, inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments ye shall be led towards the promised land; and ye shall know that it is by me that ye are led." Note the condition: Keep the commandments. Note the promise: the Lord will prepare the way before you, and you'll make it to the promised land. The way is set: Christ is our example and shows us the way to the promised land. Faith, repentance, baptism, Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end. It's that simple. Those are the important steps. If you do those things, then you're good. You'll be ok. The little things you do in between honestly don't matter that much because as long as you do your best to follow the commandments, the Lord will lead you to where you need to be. He lets you make your own life; he lets you chose your job, your spouse, your shoes, and he'll give you specific instruction if you need it (like my going on a mission-he TOLD me to). But he loves you as the individual you are, and he's going to let you become the person you want to be. If you are keeping the commandments given by him OBVIOUSLY you're being lead by him.

Just keep calm and keep the commandments.

There's so much more we can get out of this story. You can do that through your own personal revelation. I hope that this helps those who've asked for direction. Priesthood blessings of council, patriarchal blessings, and scripture study can help you a TON. Trust the Lord, and know that he trusts you to make good choices. My life has in no way turned out the way I would have wanted three years ago when I applied for college. But what has come has been WAY better. It's been hard, but I've grown more than I ever thought I could have. Stay positive, follow the commandments, and just build the boat :)

*Just remember that this is how I think. You need your own personal revelation for your life. What do I know? Maybe the pants you're wearing DO make a huge difference. But, I feel like the Lord would let you know ahead of time.
**Also, I apologize that I'm too lazy to figure out proper formatting on this particular site. If you can read it, it's all good.

     In case anyone missed the memo, it's Christmas time. Or, well, I suppose holiday time in case you don't celebrate Christmas...point being, we all practice more acts of love, friendship, and giving at this time of year regardless of what is being celebrated. Even people not celebrating anything are still affected by the increased charity. 
     Charity is what I wanted to focus on today. In Ether 12:33-34 he says " And again, I remember that thou hast said that thou hast loved the world, even unto the laying down of thy life for the world, that thou mightest take it again to prepare a place for the children of men. And now I know that this love which thou hast had for the children of men is charity; wherefore, except men shall have charity they cannot inherit that place which thou hast prepared in the mansions of thy Father." Love and charity aren't exactly the same thing. They're similar, however, charity means even more than love. So said Shakespeare, "They do not love that do not show their love". Charity is love in action. When you have charity, you love unconditionally to the point that Christ does.
      Moroni sums up charity in a way that matches Ether's description: "But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him."
    The pure love of Christ seems a little unspecific however. To go into more detail, check out these descriptions by Paul and Moroni: 
1 Corinth 13: "Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself an unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away."

Moroni 7:45-46 "And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things, wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail"

     Both make extremely similar assertions about charity, or, by its other name, the pure love of Christ. If we have charity, we will reach out to those who may not be like us, and seek not our own. Pride will not stop us from helping and valuing others. We are not easily provoked, nor do we think unkindly about others: we try to understand their point of view and are slow to assume the worst about them. Those with true charity are glad to do things that are good in the sight of God, and are quick to love and help others, while being slow to do anything that would hurt or sadden our Father in Heaven or other people. They understand that Christ paid for their sins and they have enough love to avoid hurting Him, and they take advantage of that gift of the atonement for which he paid so high a price. They have the power to endure because they love, and because they are loved by God. They have hope. Charity, true charity, never fails. No act of love or kindess is ever wasted. And charity is what makes us like our Heavenly Father and Christ. If it hadn't been for a pure, unselfish love, they would never have blessed us, and Christ would never have sacrificed for us. If we have nothing else, we are instructed to "cleave", to hold onto, charity. It will never fail.
    

Paul says in 1 Corinth 13: " And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing."
    Charity is more than simply performing acts of kindness because we know we are supposed to do them. Charity is the changing of who we are. It is allowing love to inspire our actions and make us more perfect and Christlike. Anyone can exercise charity. You don't have to know every mystery of the gospel, you don't have to have faith to move mountains, you simply have to desire to love, and to act on that love. That charity will help you to develop hope and faith. They all go hand-in-hand. 

     Don't leave your love at Christmas. Let it turn into charity which endures forever. Strive to have that pure love of Christ in your life every day, and you will find peace. You will be free of jealousy, hatred, and fear. Your thoughts will turn outwards as you focus on others and what you can do to show your love for them. Your own problems won't be so big, and you will strengthen your relationship with Christ because you will understand why He did what He did. Pray for opportunities to serve and show love, and I promise, from personal experience, that you will find them. 

     It has been a while since I've posted anything...slow computers. Ya know. But, now I have a fast one. So, PERHAPS I'll post more often.
    Anyway, I'm in a new area and I've spent the last little bit in a trio. Our senior companion went home today after faithfully serving and extending her mission. I felt something like a mom dropping off her kid at college but also like all three of us were going on just another missionary adventure when we took her to the office. But that wasn't the case.
    It made me think a lot about many different things. Today I just want to use the scriptures to help explain how I feel about working with companions. I've had (including the MTC) five. Every one of them has taught me something entirely different that I needed to be able to move myself forward personally. 
     Christ says in John 15:16 "Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you." I love this. Because we lived with Heavenly Father before, and knew each other before, we also agreed to be companions. Ye have not chosen me. I have chosen you. No matter what I go through, joys or struggles, I chose my companions before. I knew that they would help me to grow the most. That they would help me to "bring forth fruit", to help other people and to help myself. 
     Another scripture I love about companionships is from the Book of Mormon in Alma 8. Alma prays so hard and is rejected by so many people. I can't even imagine his discouragement. But, just when he's ready to give up, the Lord gives him a boost. Amulek agrees to feed him. I don't think I've ever had such a successful dinner appointment in my life. Usually, we're lucky if we get out with a legit referral...Alma came out with  a boss companion. Seriously. Check out what happens when they start working together:"And they had power given unto them, insomuch that they could not be confined in dungeons; neither was it possible that any man could slay them; nevertheless they did not exercise their power until they were bound in bands and cast into prison. Now, this was done that the Lord might show forth his power in them. And it came to pass that they went forth and began to preach and to prophesy unto the people, according to the spirit and power which the Lord had given them."
      Things didn't get easier. But Alma didn't have to stand alone anymore. Because of their desire to do good, and because they were both so strong in their faith they were granted awesome power. I think that power of doing miracles was more for their sake, as a reminder that the Lord would look out for them, more than to prove anything to the people. A strong, joyful, working companionship is granted power, and strength to endure. They lift each other up and support each others testimonies. 
     Every companion I have had has made me reflect on who I am. Each has shown me a different point of view. I know that any two people who are willing to give up their selfishness can get along and work together. I chose my companions before I came here, knowing that they would make me the person that I need to be. I am grateful for every trial, because they have humbled me and made me stronger. I am grateful for every good time that has become a sweet memory of my mission. I love all of my companions soooo much no matter how things went. I learned from each, and I am glad that I can be out here serving a mission, devoted to hope, love, and the greatest cause imaginable. I've served with people I never thought I would and there could be no better thing in the world for me. Hurrah for Isreal. ;)

Recently, we were teaching one of our younger investigators about resurrection and he posed an interesting question. Why do we need bodies? Of course we gave him an answer that was comprehensible to a child, but his question really made me think. Why do our bodies and spirits need each other? The short answer is that one without the other is nothing. One is simply an intelligence, the other is a lifeless mass. See this quote I found by Spencer W. Kimball:

Science tells us that without the spirit, all that is left is a quantity of water, fat enough to make seven bars of soap, sulfur enough to rid one dog of fleas, iron enough for a large nail, magnesium for one dose, lime enough to white wash a chicken coop, phosphorus sufficient to tip some 2200 matches, potassium enough to explode a toy cannon, sugar to fill a shaker, and little more. But with a spirit directing mental process and physical maneuvers man is 'little lower than the angels' and is 'crowned...with glory and honor' (psalm 8:5).

     Clearly this supports the idea that the body alone is no more than parts pieced together. Here's a comparison James gives: "For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also." Dead is pretty final. Just like having faith but not acting on it does nothing, so the body without the soul does nothing. 
     In high school I visited a cadaver lab and I was surprised to find that the bodies reminded me more of a cross between a my-size-Barbie and rubber chicken than a person. I didn't know those people, so to me there was no personality attached and never would be. They were simply bodies. Flesh, with no intelligence to cause it to function, and basically as useful as frozen chicken. 
     However, that intelligence, or soul, alone with no flesh can't do much either. I wrote earlier about where we came from and about how Lucifer became Satan. Well, Satan doesn't have a body, nor do his angels. They are simply intelligences that cannot progress because they have nowhere to go. Remember when Christ cast the evil spirits into the swine? "And all the devils besought him, saying, Send us into the swine, that we may enter into them. " (For those who are skeptics of possession, look, i'm not saying it happens often. However, our spirits entered into our bodies. Is it so absurd that a spirit without a body might try to do the same?) Those intelligences wanted bodies enough that they would take those of pigs. They could not inhabit them for long without causing death, however even to have a body for a little time seems to have been satisfying. 
     You see, we believe that one of the main reasons we came to earth was so that we could gain a body. As just a floating existence, there wasn't much we could do. But, having a body as our Father has, we could learn to create as He does and to become like him. The soul is the intelligence and causes the animation, but and the body is the extension and empowerment of that. 
     The soul is the why and the body is the how. 
      As a second witness, Nephi says "For I know that ye have searched much, many of you, to know of things to come; wherefore I know that ye know that our flesh must waste away and die; nevertheless, in our bodies we shall see God." I don't know how all, or really even part of the resurrection is going to work. I found an interesting note by Russel M. Nelson where he discussed how our body has regenerative powers (using the example of skin cells which are always dying but being replaced by new ones) that become dormant as we get old, but may perhaps be accessed again when the Savior comes. Regardless of how, I believe it will happen. As Nephi says, in our bodies, renewed and perfected, we will see God.

     One of the scriptures that I think contains SO much is in Luke 22: "31 And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat: But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren." 
     The first time I read this, I was pretty confused thinking "...this man SAW Jesus Christ. He was as right-hand-man as it gets. WHEN he is converted...? What?" And then we come to find that he denies Christ three times. And yet, he later is willing to suffer immensely and die for Christ. What gives? 
      Peter had the man. But, so did the Pharisees. Both saw miracles. They had to chose to believe that what they saw to came from God (Christ being there, the Holy Ghost was not yet granted). Physical evidence, while present may be convincing and stick with us for a while. The witness of the Holy Spirit, however, is a much deeper impression because it surpasses the physical limits we have and speaks truth directly to our soul. 
      Consider Alma the Younger who Satan desired to have, and certainly did have for a long time. Then, he is rebuked by an angel and sees Christ. He says "And this is not all. Do ye not suppose that I know of these things myself? Behold, I testify unto you that I do know that these things whereof I have spoken are true. And how do ye suppose that I know of their surety? Behold, I say unto you they are made known unto me by the Holy Spirit of God. Behold, I have fasted and prayed many days that I might know these things of myself. And now I do know of myself that they are true; for the Lord God hath made them manifest unto me by his Holy Spirit; and this is the spirit of revelation which is in me." For all he knew, he'd just had some CRAZY weird dream. I've had some of those. To confirm to himself that that wasn't the case, he fasted and prayed for the Holy Ghost to help him know the truth. 
      Remember, Laman and Lemuel saw angles and had all sorts of physical manifestations, but they only behaved until the effect wore off. The Pharisees knew every law and lived by them, but were never changed by them. And that change is really what it's about. When you see that even though life isn't easier, it's easier to bare. When you feel comfort in your heart in hard times. When you have hope to make it another day. When you feel calm and sure that something is right. Physical manifestations alone do not have the power to do that. Only when they come with the witness of the Holy Ghost which changes us. 
     I want to point out also that bit about "Satan hath desired to have you". Simon would later be known as Peter, or, "The Rock". The leader of the church after Christ. OF COURSE Satan desired to have him. And worked on him HARD. As he does with anyone who has great potential. If you feel like you keep messing up, or you keep being tempted over and over, perhaps it's because while you may be weak now, you will be so incredibly important later that Satan is going to do everything he can to make you slip up. To make you deny Christ. But, when you get the strength and understanding to overcome those traps, then you will be able to strengthen your brethren. Never give up. You can always repent and get better. And you can say to other being tempted "I overcame Satan. You can. I'll be with you every step". And you will be a leader, just as Simon Peter was.
      Now then, if you've been expecting a choir of angels to come down to you and for Christ to appear after you read the Bible or Book of Mormon...well, it's not really that exciting. But, if you've found that you have less desire to sin, more desire to serve and love, more peace in trials that have slowly crept into your head, that's the Spirit. That's your witness of truth. Once you feel the Spirit, you must act on your faith. To know you're on the right track, ask yourself these questions from Alma: 5:"And now behold, I ask of you, my brethren of the church, have ye spiritually been born of God? Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts? Do ye exercise faith in the redemption of him who created you? Do you look forward with an eye of faith, and view this mortal body raised in immortality, and this corruption raised in incorruption, to stand before God to be judged according to the deeds which have been done in the mortal body?" And once you begin to be able to answer yes to these questions, you are becoming truly converted. And then is it our responsibility, as Alma is doing here, and as Christ instructed Peter, to strengthen our brethren. 

     Once we are truly converted, once we have had a mighty change of heart, then we must feed His sheep. We must be an example. Be the rock where others get their strength until they are converted as well. Your conviction will grow as you do. It's a circle. As we strengthen each other, we become stronger ourselves. 

Back at good ol' BYUH, I once heard another student give an epic lesson about
the "tongue of angels". Remembering that lesson, and trying 
improve as a missionary, I read this scripture from 2 Nephi 2: "Do ye not remember that I said unto you that after ye had received the Holy Ghost ye could speak with the tongue of angels? And now, how could ye speak with the tongue of angels save it were by the Holy Ghost? Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, they speak the words of Christ. Wherefore, I said unto you, feast upon the words of Christ; for behold, the words of Christ will tell you all things what ye should do."
    Tongue of angels. Well, that sounds pretty sweet. Soooo...if an angel, or even Christ, were speaking to me, what would they say? What would they talk about? How can I say those things?
      The last question seems to be the one that Nephi is directly answering: to know the words an angel would speak we must study the words of Christ. Because, obviously, angels speak the words of Christ. If we as humans study the words of Christ, the Holy Ghost will bring all things to our remembrance. The we shall always know how to speak. I think that includes a sensitivity to wording and topics of conversation as well. 
     Like with much of the workings of the Spirit, I think that there's a lot of common sense involved. I could give about a billion Biblical references for how we should speak, but I feel like this one suffices me. The whole chapter is fantastic, so go and read it, but for my purposes check out this verse from James three: "10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be." That's not a "pick on or the other" statement. The common sense comes in when we go "maybe he's saying we should always bless rather than curse". Glad we had that talk. 
     Do you imagine angels insulting people? No. They may remind us of natural consequences of sin, but they're not mean so much as stern about it. Consider that scripture about whoever should call his brother Raca (which, as I understand roughly translates to "fool") is in danger of hellfire. I don't remember Christ telling the adulteress "You are so stupid. You'd better feel lucky I didn't have you stoned. Why would you even do that?!". He didn't yell at the apostles for not being there for Him
while he suffered in the Garden. He didn't angrily protest as he was condemned to death. Rather, he remained controlled. He was understanding, even when he was disappointed. If you don't have nothin nice to say, don't say anything at all. And if you don't nothin nice to think...find something. Thoughts become words.      
     Moving on with that, here's a 3 Nephi verse that is actually referring to sin in general, but let's apply it to what happens when we decide not to speak with the tongue of angels: "2 Wo, wo, wo unto this people; wo unto the inhabitants of the whole earth except they shall repent; for the devil laugheth, and his angels rejoice, because of the slain of the fair sons and daughters of my people; and it is because of their iniquity and abominations that they are fallen!". You know those people who make a joke at your expense, say "just kidding", and think it's ok? You sit there going "...I think I was just insulted...". Have YOU ever made fun of someone, and then brushed it off by pretending to be joking? Do you think perhaps that your real audience, the ones who really think it's funny are the devil and his angels? It's an odd sounding metaphor, but seriously; are we making jokes that would only be funny in comedy clubs in hell?       
    Now that I've been good and heavy handed, I want to bring up this: that angels often bring glad tidings of great joy. Why don't
we do that more often? Can we more often say words of love to each other? Can we focus on saying words of hope and happiness? Imagine how you think an angel would speak. They weren't trying to be Johnny Raincloud.Christ never said "Well, you messed up. Guess there's nothing you can do." Instead, he encouraged people to improve and change. He reminded that this life is not the end and that it gets better. I can tell you from experience that people like an optimist much better than a pessimist. You don't have to be unrealistic, you can know that things are going down the toilet and still look for a silver lining. 
     What this boils down to is that angels are angelic (mind=blown, right?). People who speak with the tongue of angels are
angelic. Angelic people are the ones who speak kindly, and hopefully, who speak the words of Christ. I know it's not an easy thing, but one who controls their thoughts and, in turn, words will be happy. They will bring happiness to those around them. For
missionaries, companionships will be strengthened, and better teaching will be enjoyed. You will give more people hope, which will help them and movtivate them more. Our words and the tones we use affect everything. Listen for the Spirit before speaking, check your thoughts, and always ask yourself "am I speaking with the tongue of angels?"

     In my opinion, the one thing that holds back the human race more than anything is fear. I say fear over hate because fear causes lots of back things. Like hate. Fear of people different from you, fear you'll get beat up, fear that you're not good enough, fear of not succeeding, all sorts of fear causes all sorts of problems. If people weren't afraid of failure I think waaay more would try new things. I think we'd have way more inventions. Many new ways of thinking. Fear keeps us from trying, and therefore, keeps us from succeeding. Caution is ok: that's what keeps us safe. I'm talking specifically about fear.
     In the Book of Mormon, Moroni says in chapter 8 of his writings "16 ...Behold, I speak with boldness, having authority from God; and I fear not what man can do; for perfect love casteth out all fear."
     2 Timothy backs that up in chapter 1 with: "7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. 8 Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord"
     BAM. God doesn't make us afraid. How many times does he tell Joshua "be thou not afraid"? A. LOT.
     All you need is love. Love. Love. Then you get power. Enough power to boldness because you aren't afraid of man.
     Let us look at FIRST John (1 John) 4:7 for the answer: "Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and
every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God."
     BAM. One another. Didn't Christ say "love they neighbor"? They neighbor being e'reybody? Yes. Yes he did. 
     How does love then cast out fear? Check out Romans 5:7 "For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die." If you consider someone to be a "good man", you probably like this guy. And, if this good man is your friend, you love your friends, right? You might even dare to die for your friends. Your love overcomes your fear of even dying. If you love God, and you try to serve Him, you'll not be afraid because you know what's most important and you know he'll take care of you. So love your fellow man and love God. If you do, you'll never be afraid of trying to help because there's a chance it will make life better for those around you. Just like being a missionary. If you love everyone, and you love God, you will want everyone to be happy. You'll knock on every door. You'll listen to everyone. You'll do service for everyone. Because you love them and want them to be happy. And because you know they are children of God.
     So what is perfect love then? 
     Matt 5:48 (Christ speaking): "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect."
      3 Nephi 12:48 (Christ speaking): "Therefore I would that ye should be perfect even as I, or your Father who is in heaven is perfect."
     1 John 4:18 "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love."
    Heavenly Father sacrificed his Son for us. And Christ, that Son, atoned and edured excruciating pain for us. They bother sacrificed because they love us. To sacrifice is to "make holy". Perfect love is to love someone enough to sacrifice everything for them. Love them enough to sanctify yourself: to make yourself holy. To become perfect, or as John puts it to be "made perfect in love". Follow the example of the love showed to us by Christ and his Father and you will understand perfect love. Serving a mission is an example: if you're serving for the right reasons, leaving everything behind to help the people where you have been called, you are "losing your life" in Christ. You are changing and you are focused on serving those around you. As missionaries, we get the tiniest glimpse of perfect love. 
     As Moroni, remember that you have the power and authority of God to teach. Let your love for mankind and God overcome your fears. When you do this, you will never be afraid to talk to people. You will not fear what will become of you. You will know that the Lord is watching over you, that he is proud of you, and it is your responsability to sacrifice because you love his children. I promise that the more love you learn, the less you will fear, the more people you will befriend, the less enemies you will have, and the happier you will become. Be prayerful. Be bold. Be faithful. Be hopeful. Be loving. The world could use a little less fear and a ton more love.
 

     As a missionary, are you going to instantly find more people to teach by raking leaves and shoveling sidewalks?
     No. I'm going to tell you right now, no. I mean, it could. But you'll do a lot of service just to do service.
Should you do service anyway? Let me ask, will service make you happier? And will teaching also make you happier? Is teaching a form of service?
     I personally give a definite and resounding "yes" as an answer. Why do you think I LOVE being a missionary? Because I help people. All the time. In a lasting way. I get to tell them that they can change, and they can be better. I get to love them. I get to bless them.
     In Ephesians 6, Paul gives some awesome advice "5 Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ; 6 Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart;7 With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men: 8 Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he receive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free. 9 And, ye masters, do the same things unto them, forbearing threatening: knowing that your Master also is in heaven; neither is there respect of persons with him."
     Menpleasers. What a great word.
     Anyway, so isn't this awesome? Any good you do, the same amount of good you get from the Lord. I like to say that service is selfish. I serve, and I serve lovingly, because I feel great. Because I can step away from my own problems for a few minutes and help someone else take care of their own lives. That is a good feeling.
     And who could forget the epic words in Mosiah 2? "16 Behold, I say unto you that because I said unto you that I had spent my days in your service, I do not desire to boast, for I have only been in the service of God. 17 And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God.18 Behold, ye have called me your king; and if I, whom ye call your king, do labor to serve you, then ought not ye to labor to serve one another? 19 And behold also, if I, whom ye call your king, who has spent his days in your service, and yet has been in the service of God, do merit any thanks from you, O how you ought to thank your heavenly King!"
     Here is a true leader. He's the KING yet he SERVES his people and tells them to do the same. And both of the passages end the same way. The master of your master, and the king of your king is God. When you do good to his children, your brothers and sisters, you show that you love him. And you show you love them. And there's more love in all the world to go around. It never hurt anyone to have a little less pain and a little more kindness. There's already plenty selfishness.
     I love that Paul says the Lord is no respecter of perons. You think he only atoned for one group of people? Only for Christians? Only for the apostles? NO! He did the greatest service of all for everyone because he loves them all. Like King Benjamin lead his people by serving them, we should follow the example of Christ, our King, who served us. We should serve EVERYONE. Not just our friends, not just other Mormons, evvvvvveryone. 
     Really, Paul and Benjamin are saying the same thing: serve everyone, serve in love, because even if you're king or someone's master, the king and master of all of us is the Lord. And when you serve, you get good things in return. Serve in willingness and love, and serve everyone. As you do you will find more new friends, and you will find more love in your heart. And you'll be more happy. I know because all my time in these next couple years is spent in service. I have never been happier in my life. You're not on a mission trip. You're serving a mission. Spend every minute in the way Christ would: loving, helping, and uplifting others. It can be as simple as washing dishes for your companion, or reminding someone you're teaching of how important they are. The more love you show, the happier you will be.
    

     In the Doctrine and Covenants, in a revelation given on 9/11, 1831, verses 9-11 of chapter 64 state: " 9 Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin.10 I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men. 11 And ye ought to say in your hearts—let God judge between me and thee, and reward thee according to thy deeds."
      Forgive all men. Even the most vile, evil murderer. Because if they control our heart, if they can make us keep hurting, that's when they win. What do we gain by anger? We need to protect ourselves. However, that doesn't mean a desire to fight for revenge. Revenge brings nothing but more revenge, and more pain, and more death. We should seek to defend ourselves from those who oppress, but not to hold enough anger that we derive pleasure from war. We have to learn to forgive all who wrong us: and do that for ourselves. Forgiveness brings freedom and peace. By finding both of those things, we are definitely not letting terrorists win. And when we fight them, it should be only to free ourselves from their threatening our families and our freedom, not revenge.
      In Acts 7:60, Stephen is stoned. In dying, he cries "Lord, lay not this sin to their charge."
    And who can forget the words from Christ on the cross: "Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do." (Luke 23:24). 

     Father. Forgive them. 
     Forgive the men who have wrongly condemned your son to die. Forgive them for whipping him. Forgive them for mocking and beating him. Forgive them for forcing a crown of thorns onto his head. For making you watch your son carry his own cross. For killing him in one of the most excruciating methods of execution. Forgive them. 
     I do not claim to  understand how it feels to lose a loved one. I have no idea. I won't say that I understand that pain. But it seems to me that holding on to anger takes up time where one might be able to remember the best moments they had with those lost. Anger causes more pain. It affects you, it affects the people around you. As Mark Twain said, it truly is a poison.
     Have hope instead. For, Christ atoned that we might be healed. He atoned so that we could live again. Death is part of life.
     Matthew 20 says: 18 Behold, we go up to Jerusalem; and the Son of man shall be betrayed unto the chief priests and unto the scribes, and they shall condemn him to  death,19 And shall deliver him to the Gentiles to mock, and to scourge, and to crucify him: and the third day he shall rise again." You know who Christ suffered for? Those same people who betrayed and mocked him. And for you and I.
     Mormon 9 says: "13 And because of the redemption of man, which came by Jesus Christ, they are brought back into the presence of the Lord; yea, this is wherein all men are redeemed, because the death of Christ bringeth to pass the resurrection, which bringeth to pass a redemption from an endless sleep, from which sleep all men shall be awakened by the power of God when the trump shall sound; and they shall come forth, both small and great, and all shall stand before his bar, being redeemed and loosed from this eternal band of death, which death is a temporal death."

      Christ has loosed the bands of death. We can and will be reunited with our loved ones. Death is not the end. Lives that are cut short will be made full. Don't stop living because you lost someone. Rather, forgive, that you may be made whole. Take advantage of Christ's atonement to heal you. Leave judgement, leave punishment, to God. 

      For those who ask why God would let evil men hurt the innocent, remember what Alma and Amulek went through in chapter 14 when they had to watch women and children be martyred for believing in God: " 10 And when Amulek saw the pains of the women and children who were consuming in the fire, he also was pained; and he said unto Alma: How can we witness this awful scene? Therefore let us stretch forth our hands, and exercise the power of God which is in us, and save them from the flames.

 11 But Alma said unto him: The Spirit constraineth me that I must not stretch forth mine hand; for behold the Lord receiveth them up unto himself, in glory; and he doth suffer that they may do this thing, or that the people may do this thing unto them, according to the hardness of their hearts, that the judgments which he shall exercise upon them in his wrath may be just; and the blood of the innocent shall stand as a witness against them, yea, and cry mightily against them at the last day."

      When I think of how Alma and Amulek must have felt...they must have felt so responsible. How could they just sit by and watch? Those people were suffering because of the message those missionaries bore. But, Christ does promise "and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it" (Matt 10:39). Just as Christ was innocent, those women and children were innocent.They were going to a place of peace. 

     As for the murderers, remember that all men have their agency. Some will chose to do evil. Those that do will receive punishment that the Lord sees fit. Their victims will be the witnesses against them at the day of judgement. 

      All things will be made equal and justice will be done in heaven. There is so little that we can control, and the longer we hold on to what we cannot control, the more unhappy we will be. Let us move forward today more resolute to protect ourselves from evil. To protect those that we love. And, to forgive all those who wrong us. Not to forgive even because they deserve it, but because if we do not forgive, we cannot progress. Withholding forgiveness is stopping us from letting go of the past and moving forward to better and brighter things. Remember loved ones lost by truly living while they cannot, and have hope. Christ has made it so that we will be reunited with those we love. Pray for strength and understanding and hope. Pray for your enemies. Make sure that those who are important to you know that you love them.

In Star Wars, Darth Vader tells Luke (not an exact quote) "search your feelings, you will know it to be true."
     Luke replies "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" in the most obnoxious scream ever.
     I feel like this happens whenever we discuss the Holy Ghost in lessons. We say "search your feelings and through them the Holy Ghost will testify that what we say is true". Then comes the metaphorical scream. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I can't trust my feelings!!!!!!!" They tell me if I can show them evidence of what I'm teaching, as in some specific form of "proof" they can hold in their hands, they'll believe (please refer to the first couple paragraphs about signs in my last post Proof is in the Spirit). Let's make it clear that I think it's awesome when evidence supports the Bible or Book of Mormon. That being said, I'm always skeptical. 
     Unfortunately for those who don't trust themselves, the Holy Ghost works pretty much based on feelings. 
      "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law." 
       What Paul is saying in chapter five of Galatians is not that the Spirit is going to feel like a lightening strike. It's not going to be an obvious kick in the head. The Holy Ghost will manifest itself by good feelings. Isn't that crazy? It's that simple. Peace. Comfort. Love. Good feelings. Those are the Holy Ghost. It will be joy or happiness as opposed to pleasure. It won't be anger. It won't be malice. It won't be depression. Sometimes, it will come as a "burning" feeling in your heart. A feeling of lightness. Sometimes it's a "still small voice". Either way, the Holy Ghost is a good feeling that tells you "this is right, this is true". Sometimes, when we learn new truth we feel a little nervous at first. But if we don't let that overwhelm the Spirit, we can allow it to teach us.
        If you want a little extra test for whether you're feeling the Spirit tell you something from God or not, consider these words from Moroni 7:11:
"For behold, a bitter afountain cannot bring forth good water; neither can a good fountain bring forth bitter water; wherefore, a man being a servant of the devil cannot follow Christ; and if he follow Christ he cannot be a cservant of the devil.
 12 Wherefore, all things which are good cometh of God; and that which is evil cometh of the devil; for the devil is an enemy unto God, and fighteth against him continually, and inviteth and enticeth to sin, and to do that which is evil continually.

 13 But behold, that which is of God inviteth and enticeth to do good continually; wherefore, every thing which inviteth and enticeth to do good, and to love God, and to serve him, is inspired of God."

     Ask yourself: does this bring me closer to God? Does this make me want to do good? Does this make me want to love and help others? If you can answer yes, then those feelings come God through the Holy Spirit.

     For those who still demand physical evidence, remember that the Pharisees had Christ among them performing miracles. What better, more tangible, physical evidence could they have had? And yet they crucified him. They knew the words of the prophets, for they studied and taught them as a lifelong pursuit. But they did not believe that Jesus Christ,  who healed people before them, was the promised Messiah they had waited for. Because they knew it in their hearts, but they still ignored that feeling. Instead, uneducated fishermen became the apostles. Men who had much less experience with the words of prophets like Isaiah. The apostles and Pharisees both saw the same miracles and heard the same words. The apostles (the fishermen, the publican, the doctor) believed. The Pharisees crucified their Lord. Think about that.